I recently celebrated my five year wedding anniversary. To be completely honest, I am truly enjoying life with my husband. We’ve faced challenges as many marriages do, but our love for each other is so strong that even the most difficult experiences couldn’t separate us. Love is real when everything that was meant to tear your relationship apart, makes it stronger. Omar is my best friend. I love spending time with him and growing old with him. Marriage is beautiful when you marry the right person. Omar and I dated for two years before he proposed. Two months after the proposal, we got married in Las Vegas.
He put a ring on it! I manifested Omar into my life. He is the man I prayed for down to the tattoos on his arm and the warmth he shows my daughter. I’m in a healthy and happy marriage. It’s important to set the tone of your relationship before the marriage. Below are 5 things you should do to get the ring.
BE TRUE TO YOURSELF. I didn’t change who I was for him. I continued to be me. A lot of people start relationships off with deception. They hope to impress the other person. Then when you get deep into the relationship, the real you starts to come forward and it’s hard for the other person to accept because It’s not who they were attracted to in the beginning. If you are honest about who you are in the beginning, you won’t waste time trying to maintain a lie.
BE WILLING TO MAKE SACRIFICES, BUT NEVER LOSE YOURSELF. My husband and I were raised different. We have different personalities. I’m an introvert and he’s an extrovert. I love to be home alone and he enjoys going out, being around a lot of people all the time. You have to bend a little, but don’t break for anyone! Be flexible and be open to his desires. Engage with his family, hangout with his friends, and support his passions, but do not lose yourself in the process.
ACCEPT THAT HE IS NOT PERFECT. No one is perfect. You have to be realistic with your expectations of someone. I think we watch so many movies and love stories with happy endings, we wish that for our lives. We end up feeling disappointed when men don’t live up to our expectations. Please understand that he is not perfect and he will disappoint you more than once.
Don’t be unrealistic chasing perfection because you will never find what you are looking for. I have things about me that my husband doesn’t like, but he loves me so much that he accepts them. You have to remember that people are human. People make mistakes, and if you love the person enough, you will learn how to accept certain imperfections.
BE DIRECT ABOUT YOUR WANTS AND NEEDS. Don’t let anyone waste your time. If marriage is your goal, make it clear from the beginning. The more time you invest in a relationship, the harder it can be to walk away from it even if the relationship isn’t what you want. Be straight up with your partner and let them know what you want, what you expect, and when you expect it. Leave no room for gray areas. Be straight up about your expectations of him, the relationship and your future together. Communication is key.
DON’T TAKE SH*T. If the relationship is not going in the direction you want it to, speak up for yourself. If things don’t change, you have a real decision to make. If the man is doing things that are morally against your beliefs, values, and lifestyle, you have every right to demand change. If he loves you enough, and if he is in the right place mentally, he will do whatever it takes to keep you. Do not be afraid to put your foot down. Stand your ground and command respect (know your worth). People will take advantage of you if you let them. If he’s a real man, he will love being with a strong woman who knows what she wants and will not stop until she gets everything she deserves and more.
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