On the MTV reality series “Teen Mom”, domestic violence where women are the abusers has been brought to the forefront. Amber Portwood, a lead character on the MTV show Teen Moms’ volatile behavior has brought to light an often hidden example of how women can be the aggressors in relationships. On the show, Portwood has been seen being both physically and verbally abusive to her on-again-off-again fiance, Gary Shirley. To make matters worst, the abuse often takes place before their young daughter. In an episode of “Teen Mom”, Portwood has been caught on camera punching her fiance, Shirley, several times. She was seen hitting Shirley in the face, before kicking him in the back as he walked down a flight of stairs.
These acts of violence by women are often swept under the rug for many reasons. We question what prevents the men from fighting back or obtaining help. Is society to blame for men not coming forward when they feel locked into an abusive relationship where they are the victims? Could it be that these men do not consider their relationships abusive? Whatever the answer to these questions, the fact that it is occurring is a chief concern. Moreover, the idea of this behavior negligently taking place before young children whom may one day become an abuser or victim of abuse is quite unsettling.
BELOW ARE SIGNS YOU MAY BE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP:
1. Your partner disrespects you in public or private
2. Your partner verbally assaults you by calling you derogatory and hurtful names
3. Your partner is controlling. They dictate what you should wear, how you should act, what you should or should not do, how you should spend your money, who you should associate yourself with by separating you from family and friends
4. Your partner physically assaults you in any way; including, but not limited to hitting, kicking, punching, slapping, and throwing things at you
5. Your partner forces you to have sex when you do not feel like it or forces you to have sex in ways that make you uncomfortable
6. Your partner constantly accuses you of cheating, checks your phones and tracks your daily activities
7. Your partner constantly cheats on you and blames you for their actions
8. Your partner threatens you, someone or themselves if you leave them
9. Your constantly afraid of how your partner will react to something you say or do
10. You are afraid to end the relationship out of fear of being lonely or physically hurt
11. You feel stifled and depressed in the relationship
12. You feel like killing yourself or your partner is the only way to end the relationship
Abuse comes in many forms. Some feel as though it is limited to physical. If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, there are resources. Do not feel as though you can not get help.